from then to now
I have always been a writer and a lover of words. i loved reading as a child, but would often find myself dreaming up new stories within the worlds that i was reading about. that realization jump-started my writing.
|my writing journey|
the first story i ever wrote was about a princess who had a pet dragon who would accompany her in the form of a bracelet as she traveled the world. I would fit three lines of writing into one line of college-ruled notebooks. I did this so if anyone looked over my shoulder while I was writing, they wouldn't be able to immediately tell what I was writing about.
being a daughter of refugees, i knew that writing could not be a career but i invested in it because i loved it, it provided me an escape, it fed my imagination and kept me dreaming. i would keep notebook paper and a pencil under my pillow and if i dreamt of something worth writing about, i would scrawl it down as best i could in the dark. many of the fiction stories i've written come from dreams.
i began with these dreams, moved onto fanfiction (mainly twilight and heroes lol) and then moved into dark romance. this was the era of strong women, powerful, bloodthirsty, imperfect women who lived in a world of men (this was high school angst, don't judge me too hard).
And then, I stopped for quite some time. It was in the midst of my transition from high school to college, and the pressure to find more "serious" endeavors.
coming back to writing has always been on and off. when in high school, i was in theatre. i enjoyed performing. when i performed in college, i found that my voice became more powerful when i wrote the words that i read. that they were filled with more conviction, passion, and they were coming from me and the core of who i was. i began writing spoken word poetry, and found my passion for performing these pieces that spoke to my experience as the daughter of refugees, a HMoob woman, queer, and all the identities that created who i was. i began a blog in the midst of the 2016 election that highlighted the injustice that students of color faced at my school. i wrote as an escape, to be heard, to disrupt. (for the record i got flagged many times for my blog posts because of this lolol)
while in my graduate degree, i performed my spoken word at open mic nights and shared my love of words with my students that i worked alongside. they are the brightest and most precious memories i hold. in 2020, i entered a virtual poetry competition and was named one of the top 10 college poets in the nation.
i have only recently begun investing in my writing again. with the support of my loved ones, my inspiration, my love, and my passion has returned. it ebbs and flows, and yet i find myself investing in my writing now more than ever. i have you all to thank.
i keep a notebook by my pillow.
i have a phone filled with stories and ideas.
i will always be a lover of words, and the worlds we create with them.
they are the things that stay when people are gone.
-kab